It was a week before my marriage and I was getting very nervous. Everyone around me kept telling me it is a bad idea to get married. Their marriage ended in divorce, that I was too young. That marriage always end. My aunt overheard their comments and left the room. As I was sitting in my room prepping for the day to come I found a letter.

The letter she wrote completely changed the way I viewed arguments. It read…

“Most marriage problems can be solved if husband and wife would learn to solve problems quickly, openly, respectfully and courteously like adults in a mature way. Avoid throwing emotional tantrums and yelling. Do no emotionalize every discussion. Learn to disagree without getting angry.

Learn to disagree without getting angry. Learn to disagree without being disrespectful. Learn when to stop the argument before it gets into a verbal war. Learn when to walk away or change the subject.

When indisputable facts are presented learn to say, “you’re right, I was wrong.” Learn to argue factually allowing your spouse to express himself or herself fully without fear of judgment or reprimand. Avoid name calling or saying words that you’ll regret saying.

In marriage often you have to lose an argument in order to win your spouse. Usually, whenever one spouse wins, marriage loses.”

I have followed my aunt’s advice and can proudly say that I am happily married. Getting married to my love was by far the best decision I have made in my life. On April 8th we celebrated our 1st year of marriage and 6th year anniversary.

(Here’s a picture of us on our wedding day.)

Terence and selene april 8th

What is the best marriage advice someone has given you? Comment down below and empower other marriages.