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23 Characteristics of A Classy Lady


Class is a mysterious essence that comes in many forms, depending on the woman. It largely comes from a woman’s sense of herself – from confidence without brashness, from courtesy, from kindness, and often includes a distinct sense of style – though that style can be unique and unconventional.

A lady displays self-respect,class, appreciation, and etiquette. She does not allow her mood to affect her manners. Being a classy lady doesn’t mean that you should be snobby or stuck up, but that you should have dignity, consideration, and moderation in your daily actions.

Here are the 23 characteristics of a classy lady: 

1.A classy woman is not mean to other women

I can’t stress this enough. A classy woman is not a mean girl. She ignores women who are spiteful to her, and goes about her life on her own terms.

2. A classy woman refrains from using vulgar language. She understands that the language you use represents your mind and heart.

3. She dresses tastefully. The key here is to dress with dignity. It does not have to cost much, its more important to find clothes that actually fit you right, that are wrinkle-free, and that cover your bits.

4. A classy woman is well read and intelligent.

5. A classy women calls 9 a.m and before 9 p.m.

6. A classy lady doesn’t only introduce herself with a “hello” she also adds “It’s a pleasure to meet you”. A classy lady speaks with confidence and talks clearly enough for others to understand her. Avoid saying “hi,” or “um” because that will make you look unrefined.

7. She is mindful of peoples time and is punctual.

8.  She says “No, thank you” or “Yes, please”,  she does not respond with a “yea, yup, nope, or nah”.

9. She only gives compliments when she sincerely means it. Insecurities are easier to read than we think.

10. A classy lady offers her help and is considerate to those around her.

11. When she receives an invitation she promptly RSVPs or declines. When she receives help or hospitality from someone she sends a thank you note to display her gratitude.

12. Every time she attends a gathering she does not arrive empty handed. She brings a small hostess gift.

13. A classy lady is a woman of her word. She has a respectable reputation based on her consistency of her word. She keeps her promises and obligations. She’s known amongst her friends and family as someone who is dependable.

14. She does not call him.  A classy lady knows her worth and knows she deserves to be pursued.  If you feel the need to have to initiate contact you should know that you are not dealing with a gentleman and should move on.

15.A classy woman is not petty

She is not jealous of the woman who her husband’s chatting with. She’s not mean to the neighbour’s kid because he/she is better than her own kids.

A classy woman know she’s competing only with herself.

16.They’re dignified. Oh sure, they get upset and angry, everyone does. But the classy people I have known stay calm when they do. They respond to the issue and not the person..

17. A classy woman is a woman of substance. She is talented in all areas and inspire other women. 

18. Being a lady and acting lady-like does not mean that you are entitled or snobby. Practice having a heart of gratitude, always say thank you for specific actions or generosities.

19. A classy woman understands that looks can be deceiving, buying expensive clothing does not make up for classy. However, it is her thoughts and heart that separate her.

20. A classy woman is actively listening and engaging in conversations.

21. A classy lady seeks the truth and does not believe everything she hears. She defends the truth even when it isn’t popular. She has a strong sense of right and wrong and is passionate to see the oppressed redeemed

22. She calls her elders “sir” or “ma’am.”. When she addresses a man, it is always as “Mr. (last name)” and a woman as “Mrs.” or “Miss (last name)” until they’ve been green lighted to use their first name or nickname.

23.  She speaks faithfully. A classy lady knows that her identity is rooted in God. Her strength and vision come from Jesus Christ through daily prayer. A classy lady does the right thing even when it is not expected of her. For example, she blesses someone’s reputation who has attempted to curse hers.

I just want to mention that I’m not trying to tell you how you should be, I’m just sharing my thoughts and letting women know that it is okay to be a classy lady– there is nothing wrong with that.

My simple definition of classy is what my mother taught me. To be classy is more of etiquette, and etiquette to me is something that I practice daily. To show class you most importantly have to respect yourself.

I’m not afraid to stand up for what I believe in and be myself no matter what.

Selene Kinder

Selene Kinder

Founder of Empowering Women Now
Selene is the founder of Empowering Women Now, a platform that empowers women to live authentically as themselves. She firmly believes that women have the power to shift culture, eradicate unjust standards and ultimately change the world. When she's not working, she is most likely sipping on a cup of local coffee, walking her dog, or taking a pilates class. Connect with Selene over on her Instagram!


  1. I needed this. I’ve been trucking for so long and dealing with so many men that I became one of them.
    I really needed to read this today….thank you.

    1. I’ve been searching a way to improve myself and i came across this post in the internet. I read it and i feel that that was how i wanted to be, but as i was reading, a feeling gradually came out in my mind that i was afraid of being sort of ‘distant’ from the people around me if i decided to choose this path of being a classy lady. As we all know that now a days people don’t care much about manners or etiquette so it really has a sense of one distancing themselves from others. I worry this is because i am still a student at high school and im really scared of losing my friends as they might misunderstand me for not being a friend to them but a stranger. Even so, i still want to improve myself by being what i truly want to become.
      If you have any advice for me, i would appreciate if you reply back to me 🙂

      1. Zoe, if I may reply to your question, the word “distant” you chose appears to be aligned with aloof behavior. This is unattractive and implies superiority which is opposite of classy. Walking with dignity and allowing the intent of your heart to show is endearing and should not be equated with a fence. Those who choose to distance themselves from the refined you aren’t part of your tribe. Believe people when they demonstrate a lack of fidelity between their words and actions. You deserve better inside your circle.

  2. How amazing to see in words, so empowering to read. So many people have expressed their view of how classy I am but not quite accepted it, I am just me. After reading all 23 points you have written…. I understand. My presence, personality, presence and excistence belongs to God, who has created me to be the way I am. It was very encouraging to read and reflect on the other points of where I have lacked due to experiences and where I can build upon after just disappointedly completed a divorce, but have gained peace of mind :).
    I hope this will help and support other women to identify their own value and self worth, of which we all deserve.

    Thank you gracefully

    Love and light x

  3. I needed to draft you the very small word just to thank you so much over again about the pretty secrets you have shared here. This has been so seriously generous of you in giving easily exactly what some people could have advertised for an e-book in order to make some money for their own end, primarily considering the fact that you might well have done it in case you considered necessary. The basics likewise acted as the great way to fully grasp the rest have the same dreams just as mine to grasp significantly more with respect to this issue. I am certain there are many more enjoyable situations up front for many who scan your blog post.

  4. A classy lady knows how to use font and spell correctly, but all I ultimately forgive in light of the content.
    This is a nice article, though somewhat biased by the author’s own ideas of social politeness and correctness. I believe differently about classiness and the mannerisms that produce it (such as not calling your “date” first). I want to point out that being classy isn’t wrong, but historically has been used as a way to conform women to societal standards that don’t empower them. Yet, by putting these rules into more modern context, we can all be classy and empowered.
    Thank you.

    1. Maybelline,

      We all have different ways of looking at situations and topics. Since you disagree with parts of the material posted, respectfully, I think you should create and post an article of what you believe being classy consists of. That way there are more than one resources to look at. Personally, I like this article but am also curious on what your perspectives are, As a result, those who are in agreement with you can read and use the information that best suits them. It is also a terrific way to get you opinion out there.
      Thank you for your time.

  5. I was curious if you ever considered changing the page layout of your blog?
    Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you
    could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better.
    Youve got an awful lot of text for only having
    1 or 2 pictures. Maybe you could space it out better?

  6. Well said I say all women should try to at least adopt these qualities to create better people and surroundings around us, as you know a persons actions rub off on each other.

  7. Great article! Loved that you are not trying to tell anyone to act a certain way, however, I did not like the religious comment at the end. Classy women do not have to be believe in a God or speak faithfully, in my opinion this does not affect their class. Nonetheless you had great tips!

  8. The attributes mentioned come from Jesus so, to me, it is hard (many times impossible) to do all these things without that personal relationship and guidance from above. Jesus teaches us a golden rule: “Do unto others as we would have them do unto us”. Also, Paul teaches in scripture – Galatians 5:22,23 about the fruit of the spirit – love, joy, peace, patience,kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. All of these come through the gift we receive when we accept Christ as our Savior. The gift is the Holy Spirit. The third person of the trinity from then on directs our actions and helps us do what is nearly impossible without Him. It is also what pleases God and makes us in turn happy.
    May you seek and find the true giver of abundant life, Jesus Christ, and accept the gift of salvation for eternal life. With that, you will receive all the help needed to be a special, classy, endearing lady to all who come to know you! God bless you richly!

  9. Hi there! This is my first comment here so I just wanted to give a quick shout out and tell you I really enjoy
    reading through your blog posts. Can you suggest any other blogs/websites/forums that
    cover the same topics? Thanks a lot!

  10. Great article! I will use it to improve several things I’ve been doing wrong, and it also serves as a reminder of things I should keep doing.

  11. A guy and my Boss told me that I don’t act n do like a woman or girl and I asked him how? He said I should ask my fellow girls.
    1. I have check my life and found out that I do things hard/fast way. i mean if I want to do anything like eating, working drinking, in fact everything, I do it fast fast.
    2. I am not romantic at all. I don’t know how to seduce or attract men to fall for me. I can’t talk romantically and I find it hard accepting men for relationship or marriage.

    Please help a sister, its bordering me a lot. I want to be acting and behaving like a real woman, CU’s I am a woman.

  12. Excellent post! Thank you so much for posting practical and straightforward statements of what a classy women is. I absolutely love you mentioning Jesus Christ. He is our priority over everything!

  13. I blog quite often and I seriously thank you for your information. The article has truly
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  14. Heya! I’m at work surfing around your blog from
    my new iphone! Just wanted to say I love reading through your
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  15. Wow that was odd. I just wrote an extremely long comment
    but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear.
    Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyway, just wanted to say wonderful blog!

  16. Hi, Ms. Selene! While I could agree with a lot of this post, I also agree with Maybelline’s very respectful comment regarding some of the social bias, and especially the use of the word “classy”. I’d like to add that historically, society has also used the word “Lady” to silence women and keep them in their place. I grew up in a generation where “abuse” of this kind of language was perfectly obvious in it’s intent. I thought it had declined. I was shocked, however, that just last month a female reporter in Colorado filmed a peace officer telling her to “be a lady” (while he abused his power as an officer!) because he didn’t want her to talk, or use her legislative right to film him and his colleagues– so I guess it actually IS still relevant, today. Anyway, I don’t think it was your intent, but I do think that sometimes people still try to silence women by dictating standards of “class” and “lady”isms that discourage women from using their voices or expressing dissent. I’m raising a daughter so it’s very important to me that she be aware of this kind of historical use of language. I did some digging into your site and was more inspired by this post: (though I’d never even worry a bit about people’s marriage assumptions, lol). Thank you for being a woman who puts herself out there with her thoughts and ideas in a public space and also is open to respectful commentary. When commentary remains respectful, as it is, here, I learn a lot from people’s reactions and have bookmarked your site.

    1. Hello Mary, I love that women on this blog are respecting each other’s thoughts. I appreciate you sharing a blog that enlightened me about marriage assumptions. It was so insightful. The thread and comments in this post have honestly changed my mind in some instances and I have had to edit this particular blog more than any other. The more knowledge women share with me the more I can understand their viewpoint. I have yet to learn anything from someone yelling or cursing at me. I hope to hear from you again in another blog post.

  17. I was called classy by a man I admire and didn’t feel I understood exactly what it was that he was seeing that made him comment that to me. I read this and it almost put me to tears… graceful, ladylike guidelines….simple and sincere, absolutely admirable….your thoughts on being classy are what I aspire to be in my own eyes. Thank you

  18. Per #23. I understood that, not as a matter of religion, but that of a matter of faith that acknowledges the focus and centeredness of one’s total being and essence in actions, in that recognition created within us all of that of our Creator as we best know and understand within us.

  19. Thank you so much for sharing this. I truly truly enjoyed reading it and have to keep it in mind. I was especially moved (almost to tears >_< ) when I read your point 23, which suddenly enlightened me and made me realise where all the above characteristics are from. Yes it comes naturally when we have faith in God and we act upon God's Word. Thank you for reminding me this. May God bless you always.

    1. Jessie, thank you so much. I was so conflicted about writing point #23. I had to remind myself that if I want to empower women I need to start with myself and not be afraid to share my beliefs. Although I still worry about what people will think about me, I am more afraid of what God will think of me.

  20. I was surprised to see several commenters taking exception to #23. Did they not read the next lines: “I just want to mention that I’m not trying to tell you how you should be, I’m just sharing my thoughts ,,,
    My simple definition of classy is what my mother taught me.”

  21. Hello,
    Let me say I really enjoyed this list it was amazing indeed. When I speak to a woman I look for these characteristics why? Because my mother shown them to me. I have noticed many seemed to have focused on #23 I say insert your belief system here ladies. #23 sits perfectly with me because I am a Godfearing man. I can tell you while reading this list I said to my self, self how do these 23 things apply to you? So as I was reading it I thought well darn this could easily apply to us men as well. I all ready do these things because it comes naturally to me. I’ve noticed a few comments about the use of “lady” and “class” and take issue with it which is understandable. I as a man should take issue with “gentlemen do this or that” like hold doors or brings flowers etc. You know what I’ll do those things for a classy lady because that is what I was taught to do by an active father in my life. I will continue share this list with as many women i know who will listen and hear what you have to say.

    “Yes a lady will speak on things even if others may or may not like it and she will not be overbearing and boisterous about it” – Mary Avery

    Those words were something my mother left with me before she got her wings.

  22. I love it..its classic to me&you did your best by putting 2&2 together. Thats what us young little women need to understand that class is best for us in the future. We need to be able to show others out here not revealing yourself makes you sexy&confidant. It’s how you act&respond for others to see how you respect your self&it’s better to for your inner self to show your appreciation&how we should make an effort to show our future children respect&class is a classic idea. Thank you so much for showing me these technics it was amazing&I will surely practice my way up. Thank you once again.


  23. I also think the word “lady”, particularly in the United States, has often been misused and corrupted, being used just as a substitute for “woman” and I dislike the way the word has been degraded and not used to imply class and good manners. The word “gentleman” still has these connotations and is nearly always used in a polite way. I have even heard some people have even referred to the rudest, most badly-behaved woman as a “lady” – total misuse.

  24. I’m so glad there are people out there who still think like this! There’s too much justification of ratchet behavior these days

  25. You had me until your brought God into this… guess you can’t be a classy woman without being religious?

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